Grassholes

Take a look at this— it's a cross section of a cell from a blade of grass. 

Is it me, or does it look like it's filled with microscopic smiley faces? Just look at those little sh*ts! They're actually laughing at me, because they know their constant unwanted growth is forcing me to bust my ass by mowing 'em once a week in the brutal Hoosier heat!

Laugh it up while you can, assholes! The Ant-Lawn Movement is gaining ground all across the country, as people replace the grass in their yards with clover. Your day of reckoning's coming, grass!